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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27121160">irises.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/pyroallerdyce/pseuds/pyroallerdyce'>pyroallerdyce</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>(not at all spooky) skywalkers series [october writing challenge 2020] [20]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - 1990s, Alternate Universe - No Powers, F/M, One Shot Collection, Prompt Fic, Short One Shot, Tumblr Prompt, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000, october writing challenge</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 18:16:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,424</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27121160</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/pyroallerdyce/pseuds/pyroallerdyce</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Leia loved acting.  She loved absolutely everything about it.  But sometimes she absolutely hated it and this was one of those times.</p><p>Why did they have to schedule the Tony Awards on Ben’s twelfth birthday?  And why did she have to be nominated for one therefore meaning she absolutely had to attend?  Leia didn’t want to go.  She didn’t want to leave her son with her parents on such an important day.  She wanted to spend every second with him, let him know how much he was loved, especially given what they were currently going through.  </p><p>But the truth was she didn’t want to go to the ceremony without Han, and she was going to have to go to the ceremony without Han.  Or, even worse, they were going to arrive separately.  She could see the headlines of the gossip sections already.</p><p>or: it's Ben's birthday, Leia is missing Han, and Han brings her flowers that she wishes he hadn't.</p><p>(these will really make little sense unless you read the whole series.)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Leia Organa/Han Solo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>(not at all spooky) skywalkers series [october writing challenge 2020] [20]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947904</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>October Writing Challenge - 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>irises.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>attempt to break my writer's block day 20.  I'm so frustrated, y'all.  beyond frustrated really.</p><p>I don't even know.  I really don't.  but I love my idea of kid!Ben being very hyper.  I don't know why.  I don't know anything.</p><p>and as always, if you like what you read and you want to see more, please let me know via a comment or kudos or bookmark so that I know I'm not writing into a void.  enjoy!</p><p>october 20: "Hey, I'm with you, okay? Always."</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>1994</b>
</p><p>Leia loved acting.  She loved absolutely everything about it.  But sometimes she absolutely hated it and this was one of those times.</p><p>Why did they have to schedule the Tony Awards on Ben’s twelfth birthday?  And why did she have to be nominated for one therefore meaning she absolutely had to attend?  Leia didn’t want to go.  She didn’t want to leave her son with her parents on such an important day.  She wanted to spend every second with him, let him know how much he was loved, especially given what they were currently going through.  </p><p>But the truth was she didn’t want to go to the ceremony without Han, and she was going to have to go to the ceremony without Han.  Or, even worse, they were going to arrive separately.  She could see the headlines of the gossip sections already.</p><p>They’d somehow managed to keep the fact that they’d split seven months ago from becoming public knowledge.  Not even people in the industry knew that they were no longer together.  She’d been so happy in those first few weeks, no yelling or screaming or fighting.  Ben didn’t really seem to notice that Han was gone, which saved Leia from having to have the conversation that she wasn’t sure how to have.</p><p>But then Ben started asking where his father was because he missed him, and Leia started to miss Han too.</p><p>She absolutely hated it and it made her hate Han more.  Except she never could hate Han, no matter how hard she’d sometimes tried to.  Han was everything to her, the man who had given her the greatest joy she’d ever known in the form of their son, the one who had stood by her through everything.  </p><p>She’d forgotten all of that when she kicked him out.  She’d forgotten all of that in the days that led up to that moment too.  Actresses that shared the stage with him were allowed to talk about him in glowing terms, she reminded herself.  It was no reason to think that Han would be anything but faithful to her.  No matter how much Qi’ra had gone on about what it was like to kiss her husband, Leia needed to trust Han.  </p><p>But instead, she’d accused him of having an affair with Qi’ra and kicked him out.  </p><p>Leia was broken of her thoughts by the doorbell ringing, and Ben went running towards it.  “Dad!”</p><p>She closed her eyes, took a deep breath to center herself, and started walking towards the entryway.  Ben was pulling open the door, so she took another deep breath as Han came into view, standing there with a present in one hand and a bouquet of irises in the other.  “Han.”</p><p>“Dad!” Ben said, running forward to hug him.  “I missed you!”</p><p>“I missed you too, buddy,” Han said, smiling down at him.  “Happy Birthday!”</p><p>“Come see what Mama got me!” Ben exclaimed, turning around and running back into the house, leaving Han and Leia standing there.  </p><p>“Hello, Leia,” Han said softly, and dammit, Leia didn’t want to hear him say her name like that.</p><p>“Han.”  Leia let her eyes fall upon the bouquet.  “Those are interesting flowers for a twelve-year-old.”</p><p>“They’re not for Ben,” Han said, shaking his head.  “They’re for you.  Congratulations on the nomination.  I think you’re going to win tonight.”</p><p>Han held the flowers out and Leia sighed as she took them.  “I’m not sure I’m going yet.”</p><p>Han gave her a confused look.  “But you’re nominated.  You’ve got to go.”</p><p>“I want to spend the day with Ben and I can’t do that if I have to get ready to go to an awards show.  I was seriously contemplating calling Jyn and telling her to cancel my appearance when you showed up.”</p><p>“There is no way that I’m going to let you cancel your appearance at the awards,” Han said seriously.  “You’re going to fucking win, Leia.  You need to be there for that.”</p><p>“You do not get to tell me what to do,” Leia said, spinning around and heading towards the kitchen so she could put the flowers in water.</p><p>She heard the door close and then Ben talking rapidly as he showed Han the presents that she’d let him open that morning.  She searched through the kitchen for a vase despite the fact that she would have known where they were stored ten minutes earlier.  Her head was spinning and she absolutely hated Han more than she ever had at that moment.</p><p>Irises.  He had to make her remember the day he proposed, didn’t he?  He’d bring her bouquets of irises all the time after that day.  Opening nights, closing nights, filling the hospital room with them after Ben was born.  Nominations and awards and everything in between.</p><p>Fuck, she missed him.</p><p>She finally found the vase and worked on putting the flowers in it, taking her time to make sure that she did it right so they would last as long as possible.  When she turned to go place them in the center of the breakfast table, she found Han standing there watching her.  “Thank you for the flowers,” she eventually said, brushing past him and heading into the breakfast nook.  “They’re beautiful.”</p><p>“Leia,” Han said softly, and dammit, he really needed to stop saying her name like that.  “Can we talk?”</p><p>Leia set the vase down and rearranged the flowers again, sighing when she felt Han come up to her.  “Han, don’t.”</p><p>“You really think I’m going to listen to that?” Han said, and it made Leia react before she could stop herself.</p><p>“You never do listen to me.”</p><p>“And you have never told me that you’re jealous before,” Han said seriously.  “I know that I didn’t do anything with Qi’ra.  I know that you know that I didn’t do anything with Qi’ra.  So what is this about but jealousy.”</p><p>Leia took a deep breath before turning to face him.  “And if it is?”</p><p>“Leia, you have stopped every attempt at a conversation that I have made for the past seven months over something that you knew wasn’t true.”</p><p>Leia didn’t want to admit it, but she knew she’d never be happy again if she didn’t.  “I hate her,” she said.  “I hate her so much.  And then she spent half that interview talking about how great kissing you is and I just...I hate her.”</p><p>Han just shook his head.  “Do you remember how you told me once that we don’t know how to talk about important things?  We don’t know how to talk about important things.”</p><p>Leia let out a small laugh.  “No, we really don’t.”</p><p>Han reached out and pulled Leia to him, and Leia closed her eyes as his arms wrapped around her.  They stood like that for a long time before Leia smiled.  “Come home.”</p><p>“I can do that.”</p><p>“And come to the Tonys with me tonight.”</p><p>Han laughed.  “I can do that too.”</p><p>“Dad!” came Ben’s voice as he ran into the room.  “Can I open my present now?”</p><p>“I actually have two presents for you,” Han said, letting go of Leia and crouching down in front of him.  “Which one do you want first, the box or the other one?”</p><p>Ben thought about it for a moment.  “The other one.”</p><p>Han smiled.  “I’m going to come home permanently.”</p><p>Ben’s eyes widened.  “You’re going to live here again?”</p><p>Han looked up at Leia before nodding.  “Yes, I am.”</p><p>Ben suddenly got very quiet.  “I thought you didn’t love us anymore,” he said after a moment, and Han reached out and pulled his son into a hug.</p><p>"Hey, I'm with you, okay?  Always.  Don’t you ever think that I don’t love you,” Han said seriously.  </p><p>Ben pulled back with a smile, and then he was back to his usual animated self.  “Okay, time to open the box!”</p><p>Ben went running out of the room and Han stood up, turning to Leia.  “I love you, Leia.”</p><p>“I love you too,” Leia said, kissing him.  “I’m sorry I’m a jealous idiot.”</p><p>“And I’m sorry I took this long to press the issue,” Han said, smiling as Leia started to pull him out of the room.  </p><p>“Come on, let’s go watch him open his present while I try to figure out how to explain this to my parents.  They’re going to be shocked to see you tonight.”</p><p>“Just tell them the truth, Leia.”</p><p>“I can’t do that.”</p><p>“Then I will.”</p><p>“Dammit, I hate you.”</p><p>“No, you don’t.”</p><p>“Shut up.”</p>
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